


The Sun Will Rise (With My Name on Your Lips)

by Emeli_Thorne



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No ZA, Angst, F/M, Fluff, Light Smut, Lori and Gabriela are besties, Lori is pretty cool here, Lovers To Enemies, OFC POV, Shane's POV, Shane's heartbroken over their breakup, So much angst, high school sweethearts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-02-24
Packaged: 2019-03-08 17:27:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13463022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emeli_Thorne/pseuds/Emeli_Thorne
Summary: Gabriela Mills fled King's County after her high school boyfriend and the boy she thought was her soulmate Shane Walsh broke her heart. She erased him from her life and decided never to return to her hometown again.Years later, her friend Lori manages to lure her back to the town. Seeing Shane Walsh again is the last thing she needs.A tragic event reunites them again, prompting them both to question the reason for their break up and if there is any possibility of mending what they had.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello TWD fandom, hello Shane fans :D 
> 
> This is my first venturing into this fandom and I'm terrified of posting this fic since I've only recently started watching the show and I'm not 100% sure on characterization. I love Shane though, so with great encouragement from captaincastle, the greatest cheerleader that exists, I decided to write a this fic.
> 
> I hope you'll like it :D

Gabriela was driving down the road in her rented car with windows pulled all the way down, allowing the lukewarm breeze in. Her hair was swept up in a high bun, nonetheless sweat was gliding down her neck slowly, and the back of her dress was already soaked. The AC stopped working some ten minutes ago, adding to her frustration.

Once she left King's County eleven years ago, she swore she would never come back. That damn town and everyone in it could just go to hell for all she cared. She was just fine on her own in New York and had it not been for Lori and Rick, this town would be just a distant memory to her. A very painful memory.

But, Gabriela loved her friends and it was only for their sake that she broke her promise to herself and decided to come back. It was their ten-year wedding anniversary and Lori wouldn’t let her miss it, no matter how many excuses Gabriela made. Lori knew why she didn’t want to come back, why she hated the town so much, but figured this was the perfect opportunity to lure her back, since she wasn’t present there for their wedding nor Carl’s birth.

Lori got her there, Gabriela had to admit.

It wasn’t like she hadn’t wanted to be there. She did, desperately. She was supposed to be Lori’s maid of honour, for Christ’s sake. But when it all went down, when her heart was shattered to pieces and all that was left was her dignity and pride, Gabriela packed her bags and left the town before the sun rose.  
Now, she was coming back and her heart was already in her throat, hands clenching the steering wheel in a murderous grip. 

When she crossed the town limit, the _Welcome to King’s County_ sign greeting her, Gabriela felt bile rise in her throat as her hands started shaking.

* * *

It took her some ten minutes to reach the Grimes’ house, mostly because she forgot the layout of the town, since so many old businesses died, new ones rose and died too; the same happened with many neighbourhoods, that Gabriela struggled to find even one recognizable landmark.

The minute she parked on the Grimes’ driveway, she saw Carl run out of the house, eager to greet her. Gabriela grinned, taking off her sunglasses. She took her bag and exited the car. Carl practically tackled her to the ground with the force he ran into her. At ten years old, he was almost as tall as she and pretty strong.

“Auntie Gabriela! You came!” he shouted in her ear as he hugged her, and she could help but laugh, kissing his cheek.

“I did promise you, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, but I thought you would cancel at the last minute.”

“Not a chance.”

She ran her hand through his hair, messing it up purposely and Carl feigned being mad about it. It was something she used to do when he was younger; the habit seemed to have stuck in spite of Carl growing up so quickly.

Wrapping his arm around her waist, her arm around his shoulders, he led her inside the house and Gabriela immediately sighed in relief when she felt cold air on her skin. They went into the kitchen, where Lori was dicing some onions. 

As Gabriela looked around, she couldn’t keep astonishment off her face. 

There were pots and pans covering every available surface in the kitchen, some empty, some containing whatever it was she was making. There was sugar and flour on the kitchen floor, some oil spilt on the table, and vegetable peels all over the counters.

The smell of something simmering on the stove wafted in the air as the sound of knife hitting the chopping board echoed the room.

Carl just yelled he was going to his room to play video games and left them alone.

“What is all this?” she asked, placing the bag over a chair and walking towards Lori. When her friend heard her, she lifted her head and smiled broadly, though she couldn’t hide tiredness off her face.

“Oh, Gabriela! Finally!”

Lori dropped the knife quickly and brushed her hands against her apron, going around the kitchen island to embrace her friend.

“Hi,” she said as she hugged Gabriela, making sure not to sully her dress.

Gabriela hugged her tightly. It had been six long months since they last saw each other. They kept in touch throughout the years, but it wasn’t the same as actually seeing them all, hugging them, spending time with them. “Hey, girl. What in the world are you doing?”

Lori shrugged, brushing her bangs off her forehead with the back of her hand, returning to her previous task at the chopping board. Gabriel took a seat at the kitchen table.

“Oh, I um, I’m making dishes for tomorrow.”

“You should have told me. I would have come earlier.”

Lori shook her head, “I didn’t want to tire you with this.”

Rolling her eyes, Gabriela stood up, walking to the kitchen island and leaning against it. “It wouldn’t be a bother. I could make that coffee cake Rick loves so much, if you want.”

“Oh, would you?” Lori looked up briefly to flash her a pleading smile. “That would be great. You know how he raves about it.”

Gabriela chuckled. “Yeah, yeah. Just give me something to change, please.”

Lori showed her where the ingredients she would be needing for the cake were, then went to fetch her some clean clothes. She came back a few minutes later holding a yellow sundress with white flowers on it, just as Gabriela set aside flour, sugar, and cocoa.

“I know how much you love dresses.”

Thanking her, Gabriela went to the downstairs bathroom to change. Once she got out of her own sweaty dress, she took time to splash some water on her reddened face and neck to cool herself off, then put on the dress Lori gave her. After retying her hair, she went back to the kitchen.

Lori had already placed the kitchen utensils she would be using so Gabriela just put on an apron, washed her hands and got to work. Lori was now stirring something on the stove, glancing over to her.

“So, how was the flight?”

“Uneventful,” Gabriela replied as she turned on the oven then started greasing the pan. “I fell asleep halfway through. Then the drive almost killed me. The AC stopped working. I thought I was gonna melt.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re here. Rick will be over the moon.”

Reaching for the bowl with flour, she frowned at Lori. “You still haven’t told him?”

“Of course not. It’s my surprise for ‘im.”

Gabriela just shook her head in amusement and continued working, mixing the flour, sugar, and other ingredients in a bowl.

They worked in silence for a few minutes, until Lori broke it by asking, “So, how are you feelin’ about seeing-”

“Don’t say his name,” Gabriel asked pleadingly, feeling her heart beating like crazy even at the almost mention of him. She wasn’t really in the mood for an anxiety attack induced by _he-who-must-not-be-named_. She would have plenty of time tomorrow and whenever his sorry ass decides to make an appearance.

Lori sighed, but consented. “Ok, ok. But you know you’re gonna be seein’ him. Might as well get used to it.”

 _Ha_ , thought Gabriela, _not if I can help it._

“I’m kinda hoping I’ll be able to avoid him,” she confessed as she whisked eggs in another bowl.

Arms akimbo, Lori turned to her and gave her a look of disbelief, with a hint of smile playing on her lips. “Pray say how.”

“Just give me a bottle of wine and I’ll be fine,” Gabriela snorted and both women burst out laughing.

After a few moments, when they had recovered, Lori said in all seriousness, “Listen, I want you to know how much this means to me, to us. I know how hard this was for you, comin’ here.”

“Yeah, well, when you threaten to never visit me again, what other choice did I have?” Gabriela asked jokingly with her eyebrow raised, though part of her still hated being in that damn town, amongst all those people...

“Fair point.” 

Just then they heard a car pull over. When she leaned to look through the window, Lori gasped. 

“It’s Shane!”

Almost dropping the bowl with the batter, Gabriela stood wide-eyed, panic overtaking her. 

“You didn’t tell me he would be here today!”

Lori tried to calm her down, “He’s not supposed to be. Wait here,” she instructed her as she washed her hands in the sink and went to open the front door.

* * * * *

Gabriela stood behind the slightly ajar kitchen door, ears straining to hear the conversation. Yeah, yeah, she was nosy. Sue her.

“Hey,” Lori greeted him.

“Hey, Lori,” Gabriela heard him say, but there was something in his voice...

There was a pregnant pause, then Lori’s breathy, “What happened?”

Frowning, Gabby dared to push the door slightly, not sure if Lori and Shane spoke that quietly or if she was just too tired from her trip to concentrate.

“He got shot. I-I-I tried to, I couldn’t-“ 

Shane’s words got lost in Lori’s wails and sobs and Gabriela wished nothing more but to go inside and console her friend, but she just couldn’t do it, couldn’t face him. The mere prospect of that gave her a headache and made her insides churn.

“Where is he?”

“Hospital. I just came to tell you, give you a ride.”

Hearing doors open and footsteps heading her way, Gabriela hastily retreated from the door just as Lori came in. She was already in tears, hands trembling as she reached for Gabriela.

Wrapping her arms around her, Gabriela swallowed her own tears and did her best to offer her friend support.

“Lori.”

Pulling back, Lori took a moment holding onto her arms to steady herself.

“Can you please, Carl...” she croaked, unable to finish the sentence. 

Nodding Gabriela, gave her another quick hug then led her towards the front door after Lori tucked her phone into the pocket of her jeans.

“Call me, please,” Gabriela pleaded though unsure if Lori even heard her with how fast she ran towards Shane’s patrol car. Gabriela hid behind the door, afraid he might have seen her.

After Lori left, Gabriela returned to the kitchen to turn off the stove and the oven, all thoughts of food forgotten. 

She had to take a deep breath and try and rein in her own feelings as she climbed up the stairs. She heard a faint sound of gunfire through one of the doors and correctly assumed it was Carl’s room. She knocked and heard him _yell come in_.

Her hands were shaking as she opened the door, taking a quick notice of the room before her gaze caught Carl sitting on the floor, playing a video game with headphones on.

He pulled on one side when he noticed it was her and grinned, pausing the game.

“Hey, auntie.”

“Hey, sweetie.”

 _Oh, god, how was she going to tell him this? She had never been in this position, least of all telling a child ..._

Sensing her discomfort, Carl took off his headphones and started getting up but Gabriela stopped him, joining him instead on the floor.

Taking his hands in hers, she started telling him that his father’s partner came over to let them know his father had been hurt on the job.

She did her best to keep her voice in check, but a few tears escaped her, and her voice broke when she told him _hurt_. It sounded less serious than getting shot, but she didn’t want to scare him more than he already was.

Instantly, Carl started pulling his hands from hers and frantically saying how he has to go to his mom, but Gabriela managed to calm him down enough to tell him that Lori would call them should anything happen. 

Gabriela understood her friend – having Carl there would freak them both out more than necessary, especially since they had yet to find out Rick’s status.

So instead, she held him as he cried, and she cried with him, fear of losing someone so important to her suddenly hitting her like a tonne of bricks. 

She didn’t even get to see him yet.

_If he, if he..._

They moved to the kitchen to await Lori’s call. Lori called an hour later and Gabriela almost dropped the phone with how hastily she grabbed it off the kitchen table.

“Hey, any news?” she asked, holding her breath.

She heard Lori sniff, her voice shaky, “Could you please bring Carl over? I’m so-so scared.”

“We’ll be right over.”

* * * * * * 

It took Gabriela fifteen minutes to the hospital, and as soon as she found a good parking spot, Carl and she were dashing towards the entrance. The nurse at the reception area instructed them to the waiting room and when they reached that corridor and Lori spotted them, she and Carl rushed into each other’s arms, crying their hearts out.

Lori kept smoothing his hair, telling him his dad was going to be okay, but the look of defeat she gave to Gabriela told her there were no real indications for something like that.

Gabriela kept quiet as mother and son were locked in an embrace, crying and consoling each other. 

There was nothing she could do, though her heart ached for them.

Rick was more than a friend to her. He got the honorary role of her brother early into their sophomore year, way before he got together with Lori and she and Sh- _he_ even began moving in the same orbit. 

Rick was there for her through the bad and the ugly; his parents were the ones who took her in when her own parents decided she was too much work for them. Had it not been for his parents and Rick, Gabriela knew she would have ended up on the street, she would never have graduated nor would she even have had the opportunity to leave their hometown.

She didn’t even feel tears streaming down her face until Lori started wiping them gently with her hands as her own tears escaped her. Lori’s face was all puffed, eyes red from crying.

“Any news?” Gabriela asked her, dread filling her stomach. Lori wouldn’t tell her anything on the phone.

“He fell into a coma,” she barely uttered before she broke down again that Gabriela had to hold her so she didn’t fall, pulling her into an embrace. 

“Oh, Lori,” Gabriela hugged her tightly as Lori cried into her shoulder, her whole body shaking.

“They don- don’t know when he’ll wake up.”

Gabriela didn’t want to say anything, but ugly thoughts filled her mind immediately, _what if he never woke up? What if he died?_

Carl sat on one of the waiting room chairs all curled up, face hidden by his arms, but Gabriela could hear him sobbing, could see his body shaking just like his mother’s.

How could life be so cruel?

* * * * * *

Somehow, she dozed off on one of the chairs. When she woke up startled, Gabriela glanced at the cell phone in her hand to check what time it was. Four hours had passed since Carl and she came into the hospital. Five and a half since Lori was there.

When she looked around for Lori and her son, they were seated across from her, Carl tucked into his mother’s side, both fighting off sleep, as it seemed.

Standing up, Gabriela stretched, hearing a few bones pop. She went to them, cupping Lori’s hand. Lori looked up lazily, face stained with tears.

“Let me go grab you some coffee and something to eat, yeah?”

“I don’t want-,” Lori started saying but Gabriela interrupted her immediately.

“You have to, Lori. You haven’t eaten anything since this morning, right?” When Lori hesitantly nodded in confirmation, Gabriela continued, “No discussion then.” She then turned to Carl, “Hey buddy, how ‘bout a juice and a sandwich?” 

Carl assented too and Gabriel smiled weakly, relieved they were at least willing to eat. She was afraid they would collapse from exhaustion, especially Lori who was paler than Gabriela had ever seen her.

“Okay, be right back.” Lightly squeezing Lori’s hand, Gabriela headed towards the hospital cafeteria.

Getting them both some turkey sandwiches, coffee for Lori and her and a bottle of orange juice for Carl, Gabriela was walking down the corridor towards the waiting room where they were, trying hard not to spill the coffee all over the floor and herself. A third of coffee from one of the cups had already spilt when the bottle she was holding under her arm slipped slightly. 

“Hey, I got you guys-” she looked up and immediately froze in place, the bottle under her arm falling loudly onto the floor.

Her breath caught in her throat and she felt dizzy.

Shane Walsh was leaning against the wall dressed in his deputy uniform, arms crossed on his chest, a pensive look on his face. The moment he registered her, he uncrossed his arms, mouth agape, eyes wide like he couldn’t believe she was there.

“Gaby?” he rasped.

It was barely audible but the sound of his voice had reached Gabriela’s ears nonetheless. 

She couldn’t move, couldn’t say anything. His eyes were locked with hers, those big brown eyes that haunted her dreams even a decade later.

She felt a wave of nausea wash over her.

_Oh crap._


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shane's POV of the events from the day Rick was shot and a flashback to his and Gabriela's high school days

Shane is standing in the men’s room back at the station, staring at his hands covered in Rick’s blood.

_He could die, he could die. And it would be your fault._

Opening the faucet, he scrubs his hands vigorously with soap, making sure to scrub under his fingernails too. Watching the blood wash of his hands, stain the sink, disappear into the drain, he can think of nothing else but the fact it was his best friend’s, his brother’s blood he was washing off.  
  
There is so much of it, or so it seems to him.

He scrubs his hands until his skin starts to hurt and is almost the same colour as the blood he is washing off.

Then, he splashes some water over his face just to calm himself, bring himself to reality and out of his head. Lori would have no use in him being all frantic as he informs her her husband was shot.

Changing his blood-soaked shirt and the t-shirt underneath it for some clean ones he keeps in his locker because he doesn’t want to scare Lori out her mind, Shane is quickly back in the squad car, driving towards the Grimes' house.

 

There are ways to tell someone their loved one’s been shot or killed. Ways to be sympathetic, caring, to ease into the news in spite of knowing what their reaction is going to be. They train you in that, prepare you for the most likely scenarios and reactions. It takes years to get used to that, they say.

They don’t tell you you never get used to it.

This has never happened before, though - Rick getting hurt on the job so severely that would require a surgery.

Everyone’s been shot at least once - that comes with the job and Shane’s just fine with that. You can’t be a cop if you’re afraid of that, afraid of dying because that just something that can happen to you responding a simple call as much as it can happen while you’re in a high speed chase.

But there is a difference when the one who is hurt is you and when the hurt one is someone you care about. Somehow, the feelings intensify, almost like you care more about others than yourself.

He’s got no one to mourn him when he’s gone, and he _will_ be gone, sooner or later. Shane’s made peace with it.

But Rick’s got family, people who love him and if he dies...

He doesn’t realise his hands are shaking until he parks at the kerb outside their house and turns the engine off. Dread fills his stomach and he feel like he could vomit that damn burger he ate just an hour ago.

_Shit shit shit, get it together._

Carding his fingers through his hair, breathing through his nose, he exits the car, footsteps slow and lazy as if he’s trying to prolong as much as possible telling her about Rick.

Lori is opening the door before he even has the chance to ring the bell or knock. Maybe she sensed something was wrong. They say people develop a sixth sense once they’re in a relationship, can sense when something happens to their soulmate. He doesn’t believe in that shit, but still. It’s Rick and Lori and if anyone is that connected, it’s them.

He tells her Rick’s been shot, wanting desperately to sound calm as not to frighten her but his own voice betrays him and his thoughts when he tries to excuse himself.

Lori is all tears and screams and he can’t stand to watch her like that, can’t stand to watch her falling apart before his eyes. He thinks of Carl and what this will do to him. He’s just a kid, barely ten years old, and if he loses his dad...

 

He's in his car waiting for Lori but he doesn’t want to drive her to the hospital, doesn’t want to go there at all. The smell of hospitals is one of many things he hates about this job because more often than not it brings the kind of finality to life Shane’s just not ready for, especially not with Rick.

Lori’s quick to come back, but as she runs towards the car Shane notices a figure standing by the door. They’re quick to hide behind them once Lori’s out of the house but... Maybe it was Carl.

The drive to the hospital is filled with intermittent moments of silence and Lori questioning him how it all happened.

_Was Rick wearing his vest?_

_Where exactly was he hit?_

_How serious is it?_  
  
His answers are automatic, doesn’t sound like him at all but he just can’t focus.

He keeps seeing Rick lying on the ground gasping for air, his own hands covering the wound as blood seeps between his fingers and Rick’s eyes begin to shut. He hears his own screams as he begs Rick to stay awake, that help is on the way, that he is going to be fine when Shane knows he may not be.

And it’s on him. It’s all on him.

 

Rick is already in surgery by the time they get to the hospital, so Lori and he go to the waiting room, Lori crumbling in a chair and crying as he leans against the wall, fighting off nausea.

Soon he’ll have to leave, he’ll have to go write a damn report on this but for another half hour he stays there, consoling Lori, repeating the words he told Rick - that everything’s going to be fine - when he thinks he might be just straight out lying to her too.

She didn’t see all that blood that came out of Rick’s limp body, didn’t see the way his face grew ashen, the way the look in his eyes became empty as if his soul had left his body.

He tells her it’s all going to be fine even though he himself doesn’t believe a word he says.

He leaves for the station soon after Lori convinces him to go, that she’ll have someone come and stay with her, that Carl would be there too.

Thinking it might be one of her friends, Shane assents but promises to be back as soon as he can.

 

He doesn’t remember much afterwards, everything blending in a monotonous stream of interrogation, what exactly happened, why they didn’t check the car, whose fault it was...

Shane’s got a mean headache and half a mind not to flip his desk and yell for everyone to just shut the fuck up.

There’s nothing he wants to do more in that moment but to find the damn dispatch that gave them the wrong intel and beat the fuck out of them because they might just cost a good cop, a good person their life. A kid might lose a father, Lori her husband.

He just can’t wrap his mind around all that has happened.

Tomorrow is supposed to be Rick and Lori’s wedding anniversary, for Christ’s sake. Today was just supposed to be a routine shift. This town is as uneventful as they get, yet somehow devil or god or universe itself decided today of all days was the perfect time to screw them over and is now laughing in their faces.

 

It’s another four hours before he’s free to go to the hospital again and by that point, Shane’s completely drained, barely standing on his feet.

Half an hour ago he finally puked out that burger and anything he has eaten that day and he feels like he could collapse any moment now from sheer exhaustion and guilt, but he keeps going because Rick needs him, Lori and Carl need him.

When he gets there, Lori and Carl are curled into each other, faces stained with tears, eyes swollen from crying. They look like they could fall asleep any minute now, but are stubbornly holding onto their consciousness.

If he could, he would cry too, but it’s not what they need right now.

Instead, he just greets them, asks if they want him to bring them something from the cafeteria since he’s sure they haven’t eaten anything since they walked into the hospital. Lori’s skin is the same pale colour as the hospital walls so much so that she almost blends into them. Carl is unusually silent, not even looking at him when he asks him if he needs something.

Not that Shane could do anything to make them feel better. As far as they are concerned, he’s at fault for this and he doesn’t blame them if they really think that. Lori didn’t go and outright say it, but Shane feels she blames him for this. After all, he’s Rick’s partner, he’s supposed to have his back.

As an answer to his question, Lori tells him her friend already went to get them some food. She’s got an apprehensive look in her eyes as she stumbles over her words and Shane assigns it to all the hours she has spent sitting in that waiting room and her worry for her husband.

He would trade places with Rick in a heartbeat just to spare his family this agony and suffering. He’s got no one to cry and worry over him now that he’s alive, no one to suffer when he dies.

He’s fine with that. Yeah, yeah. Completely fine.

Nodding weakly at Lori and Carl, Shane returns to his position from a few hours ago, back leaned against the wall, arms crossed on his chest as he runs the events over and over in his head, wondering how he could have been so reckless so-

A voice brings him out of his reverie and for a split second, he thinks he’s hallucinating, that his own twisted psyche conjured her up to further torture him.

But when he looks up, she’s standing there before him and he wouldn’t mind a bit if she were indeed an apparition.

He feels like someone had just knocked the breath right out of his lungs as he croaks her name, tasting it on his tongue for the first time in forever and it ends up sounding almost as if he’s begging her to talk back and confirm that she really is there.

Her expression is filled with horror as their gazes lock and Shane feels the ground shift beneath his feet.

*   *   *   *   *    *

The hallways are almost all empty, the last of the students lingering by their lockers or chatting in groups before the final bell rings. Gabriela is supposed to be on her way to her biology class but had to come back because she forgot a few books.

“Hey, lil bird,” Shane coos as he walks up behind her and Gabriela turns to give him the look of annoyance as she takes her books out of her locker.

“What do you want?”

His hand on his heart, Shane feigns being insulted as he goes behind her and leans against a neighbouring locker, facing her, “Awww, why are you always so harsh? You’re hurtin’ my feelings, darlin’.”

Gabriela sighs, closing her locker and holding her books to her chest, “Shane, I don’t have time for your nonsense. I’m late for my class.”

“Well don’t let me hold you up.” 

Shane’s face falls and he starts to leave, and in spite of knowing he’s only faking it, she calls after him. He walks back to her, this time coming closer and wrapping his arm around her waist, his forehead a hair’s breadth away from hers. 

“What did you want?” she breaths out as his fingers find their way under her shirt and his skin makes contact with hers.  
When she closes her eyes anticipating a kiss, he leans and instead whispers in her ear, “I was thinkin’, this weekend we could drive up to that little park you like, outside the town. Just you and me.”

His teeth graze her earlobe and she stifles a moan, biting her lip, but she can tell Shane heard her anyway. When he draws back, there’s a smug look on his face.

Too smug because he knows what he does to her and he just exploits it shamelessly.

“Shane, does Rick know about your little crush on me?” she asks him, infusing as much sweetness in her voice as she can muster as she grins at him, watching as her words work like a cold shower on him. Shane tenses immediately, the smirk disappearing.

“What’s it to him?”

“Well,” Gabriela starts, her fingers playing with a button on his shirt, eyes cast downwards, “I figure, if he knew just how bad you got it, I’m not sure how he would feel about you trying to take his sister to a secluded place.” She bats her lashes, her finger grazing the exposed skin of his chest, “Might think you have bad intentions, that you wanna do some bad things...”

He doesn’t let her finish, smugness returning to his whole posture and voice, “Oh, darlin’, but I do wanna do some very, very bad things with you.”

He kisses her unexpectedly this time. She was ready to get into it with him again, but when his lips touch hers, all sense of reason disappears – every single time. 

The kiss is painfully slow. Again, he does this on purpose just to rile her up and leave her high and dry until they’re somewhere far away from prying eyes and where their slow dance can become something more. As much as she protests, Gabriela lives for his slow kisses that bear Shane’s silent promise of more, later.

“Shane-”

“Come on, we need some time alone. I haven’t seen you without Rick or Lori lurking around in two weeks. I miss you,” his voice almost breaks there as he cradles her face between his hands, his thumbs brushing her cheekbones.

“You do?” Gabriela lifts her brow, sliding her hand under the collar of his shirt, his skin warm under her palm. Dragging her tongue along her lip, she teases him, “How much?”

“Come with me this weekend and I’ll show you,” he teases her back.

“I’ll think about it. What do I tell Mrs Grimes? You know how strict she is,” Gabriela says worriedly. 

Rick’s parents are some of the best people she has ever met, but his mother is a force to reckon with and if she knew Gabriela was sneaking around with none other than Shane Walsh, the boy who wore the label of a manwhore until only a few months ago, when they got together, Gabriela feared she might die of a heart attack or just flip and kick her out.

Shane, recognising her worry, running his fingers through her hair as he promises her, “I’ll take care of it, baby, don’t worry.”

Giving her a quick peck on the lips just before the bell rings, he lets go of her reluctantly. 

“I’ll see you later,” she tells him, adjusting her bag on her shoulder and heading towards the classroom.

He yells after her in an amused tone, “Is that a yes?”

She just rolls her eyes at him but beams nonetheless, blowing him a kiss.

“Later, Shane.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter features Gabriela's POV of their encounter in the hospital and another flashback of her and Shane's relationship.

After the initial shock of being face to face with Shane a little more than a decade later had passed, Gabriela managed to recover enough to just nod in acknowledgment when he called out his nickname for her, though she was quite fazed, then turning her back to him, went to Lori and Carl in spite of her legs feeling like they were made of steel.

Handing them the sandwiches and Lori her coffee with shaky hands, she was about to go pick up that bottle of juice that had fallen from under her arm earlier when Shane appeared behind her, offering the bottle to Carl. Gabriela immediately stiffened at his proximity, catching a faint whiff of his cologne, and Shane must have noticed her posture since he was quick to withdraw back to his position by the wall.

Gabriela couldn't dare to look at him lest she fell apart right there and then and started crying all over again, only this time for a whole another reason. Instead, she took a seat next to Lori and sipped at her lukewarm coffee without actually registering the taste of it, all the while ignoring Shane's persistent penetrating gaze she could feel on herself. Her hands were trembling and some of the coffee had again spilt over her hand, though she couldn’t be bothered to wipe it off.

She should have expected him to be there, should have been prepared. It was just the commotion of it all, her worry for Rick and his family that made her forget about him.

_Rick was his partner, of course he was going to be there._

Gabriela managed to catch just a glimpse of him before she scrambled to Lori’s side because her mind seemed to have frozen along with her body in that moment. However, she couldn't help but notice the change in him; after all they hadn't seen each other in ten years. The uniform suited him well, dammit. He still seemed to possess that rugged handsomeness that had her blushing from just thinking about him back when they were still in high school. And his eyes were the same warm dark chocolate colour that had her weak in the knees whenever he would train them on her.

The nausea that had appeared when she first saw him seemed to have settle a bit, but she was still anxious, still unwilling to succumb to his silent plea to just lift her gaze to him.

She wouldn't do that, couldn't.

If she did that she would burst in tears and she was feeling awful enough as it was, didn't need to add to her suffering to let him see her distraught. All the memories were there, teetering on the precipice, waiting to break that dam and break her all over again.

Lori seemed to have sensed her nervousness and the impeding panic attack because she clasped her hand firmly, offering her a tired yet reassuring smile.

Lori knew what had happened all those years ago, why Gabriela left town. Matter of fact, Lori was the only person who had the full picture, the only other person aside from Shane who knew the secret. Lori was there when all Gabriela could do was scream in agony, crying her heart out. She was the only person Gabriela trusted enough to confide her secret and Lori helped her get through it all. And when she decided to leave King’s County because the damn town and the people in it made her sick with their hypocrisy, when it all became too much and she felt like she would suffocate, Lori gladly lent her the money she was saving up for her and Rick’s wedding. _You need it more, hon. Don’t worry about me, just get yourself better._

She was doing the same now, wordlessly reassuring Gabriela she would be okay in spite of her husband being in such a delicate state and Gabriela’s issues seeming so minute in comparison. Swallowing hard, Gabriela held onto Lori’s hand, even though he breathing was growing heavy by the second.

 _Calm down, calm down. Breathe in and out_ , she instructed herself.

Eventually Shane seemed to grow tired of just standing so he sat down with a heavy sigh, but luckily nowhere near her. If he had, Gabriela knew she would have crumbled, had a full-blown panic attack or just faint. Instead, he sat in of the chairs opposite them, his gaze firmly fixed on Gabriela - she felt it bore into her cheeks, her hair, her hands despite of her never making an eye contact with him.

How dare he? If he was half a decent person he would point that stare to the floor and show at least some semblance of shame after everything that had happened!

Couldn’t he tell how much it hurt her having him there, a physical reminder of what she had lost, what they could have had?

Her stomach hurt at the memory of their tragedies, all the disappointments, and broken promises of a future together.

Another two hours had passed and there still wasn’t any change in Rick’s condition. After having a brief talk with his doctor, they agreed they should go home and come back tomorrow.

Lori and Carl went ahead, the mother wrapping her arms around her sobbing son’s shoulders. Gabriela followed them, her tread swift, feeling Shane’s presence steadily behind her. She had half a mind not to turn and tell him to fuck off, to leave them alone. It was all too much for her.

Luckily, he didn't try to initiate any kind of conversation with her. If he had, Gabriela wasn't sure she would be able to keep it all in any longer.

When they got out of the hospital, it was already nightfall, the air a bit chillier than when she came earlier that day. Carl, Lori, and Gabriela were quick to settle into their seats in Gabriela’s car, all three of them exhausted. Just before Gabriela started the car, eager to get the hell out of there as soon as possible, Shane leant over the passenger window to speak to Lori. Gabriela couldn’t hear a word they said, the blood rushing in her head drowning their voices.

When Lori touched her hand to indicate they could head home, Gabriela flinched. Lori apologised but Gabriela just shrugged it off.

Her throat was burning and she wanted to scream, but instead focused on the road ahead. All the way home her hands gripped at the steering wheel with such force her knuckles started hurting. Her breathing was ragged but she tried to rein it in as not to worry Lori any more than the poor woman was already coping with.

"Hey, I'm really sorry about that. I completely forgot he would come back.”

“Not your fault. Don’t worry,” Gabriela’s answer was curt and distant. Lori didn’t say anything afterwards.

When Gabriela parked her car on the Grimes’ driveway, Lori and Carl went inside and Gabriela went to the trunk to take a change of clothes and her toiletries. There wasn't any time to take her luggage out before, and now it was too dark to try and haul it by herself. She'd get to it tomorrow.

Getting inside the house, she was about to go upstairs thinking Carl and Lori must’ve already settled in their rooms, when she noticed the light turned on in the kitchen. Walking into the kitchen, Gabriela found Lori sitting at the table, her face in her hands as she cried.

Gabriela approached her slowly, leaving her things on a chair nearby.

“Lori-”

“I just can’t wrap my head around this. Our anniversary is tomorrow an-and my husband might die.”

Gabriela crouched beside her, taking her hands in hers. “Hey, don’t think like that. Rick is strong, he’ll pull through.”

Lori hiccupped, wiping her tears with trembling hands, “I just can’t imagine my life without-”

“And you won’t have to because everything’s going to be just fine. He’ll wake up in no time and this will be just a bad memory,” Gabriela assured her, hoping for a miracle herself.

After a few moments, Lori sniffed, then looking around the kitchen and all those plates, pots, pans and whatnots cluttering the space, she sighed in resignation.“Look at this mess.”

Gabriela kissed her cheek and made her stand up, sending her off to bed. “I’ll clean it all up in the morning. You go rest.”

Lori took her by surprise by wrapping her arms around her waist, resting her cheek on Gabriela’s shoulder. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

Hugging her back, Gabriel reassured her again that Rick would make it, then turning off the lights and locking the front door, followed Lori upstairs.

Lori decided to sleep in Carl’s room that night and Gabriela understood her completely. Her son was all she had now, her own safe harbour as she feared for her husband’s life. If there was any way should could comfort them... but for now, it seemed all they needed was each other.

After brushing her teeth, washing her face, and putting on some shorts and an old ratty t-shirt she managed to dig out of her suitcase in the dark, Gabriela lay in the guest room bed, her arms crossed behind her head as she thought of the events from the day, her own heart betraying her at the thought of him by hammering in her chest.

Try as she might, sleep wouldn’t come. Gabriela kept tossing and turning, struggling to ward off Shane’s face from her mind. She felt horrible that seeing him got to her in such a way and Gabriela couldn’t escape the onslaught of memories from past life that she had been fighting off the entire day.

*    *    *    *    *

“Hey, lil’ bird, you ready?” Shane calls for her, standing at the bottom of the stairs in the Grimes’ home, nervously tapping his fingers against the banister.

He is more anxious than he has ever been, fearing that his plans for tonight might not be to Gaby’s liking. He desperately wants to do things right with her, to show her how much he cares, that he isn’t fucking around this time.

Not with her. Never with her.

“I’m here,” she comes rushing down the stairs in a faded denim jacket carrying a small duffel bag, her hair swaying tied in a ponytail, her red sundress swishing around her thighs.

Gaby throws herself in his arms and Shane catches her readily, burying his head in the crook of her neck and kissing her a few times below her ear because he knows that is just one of her weak spots. When she gasps and pushes his shoulder playfully, he knows he got her.

Giggling, Gabriela pulls his face to hers and kisses him hard on the lips before taking his hand and eagerly dragging him towards the door, yelling a goodbye to whomever else was in the house.

When they are seated in his truck, her duffel bag lying on the backseat, Gabriela turns to him, a curious look in her eyes. “How did you convince Mrs. Grimes to let me go with you, Walsh? Last time I checked, even Rick was banned from goin' anywhere with your 'cause of _the incident_ ,” she asks him, her brow raised as she reminds him of the mess he dragged Rick in just a week ago.

Raking his fingers through his wavy hair, he looks down, his voice filled with guilt as he tells her, “I know she has a soft spot for me since my mom... wasn’t that hard to convince ‘er.”

He doesn’t end it. Doesn’t need to since Gaby already knows everything about him. Everyone in this damn town does.

His mom died three years ago. Heartbreak they say, after her husband up and left her for a much younger woman. Shane lives with his uncle now, since he is the closest relative Shane has. His father is an asshole who doesn’t bother to call or text his son, doesn’t even send him money for textbooks. His uncle Frank is the sweetest person though, always so approachable and full of good advice for the youngsters of the town. He never preaches; just tells you things as they are and you can take it or leave it.

Shane works in his uncle's mechanic’s shop three days a week after school and the other two days he’s busy going around town, doing random things for people just to earn a buck because he doesn’t want to depend too much on his uncle.

Gabriela cradles his face, making him look at her and kisses him gently. “Baby, please don’t think about it. I don’t want you to be sad.”

God, he loves her so much.

He’d say he feels like shit for using his mom as an excuse, but he knew there was no other way Mrs. Grimes would ever let Gaby go with him. He sends a silent apology to his mom, hoping she would forgive him. Gaby’s just too important to him and these past few weeks were torture without her.

When he nods to indicate he’s no longer on that train of thought, Gaby smiles at him as Shane pulls off the driveway, one hand on the steering wheel the other on her naked thigh. He is all smiles when she sighs contently.

“So...” she starts, and he steals a glance in her direction, “you said weekend.”

“I did.”

“So we’re gonna be alone all that time?”

“Was plannin' on it. Damn,” Shane sighs as he takes a turn, his hand gripping her thigh, enjoying the feeling of her soft supple flesh under his palm, “I feel like I haven’t been with just you in forever.”

Gaby laughs, tossing her head backwards because to her it seems like he’s exaggerating. They’ve seen each other plenty of times. “Oh, don’t be so dramatic. We’ve been alone.”

“When?” he asks and anticipating her answer, adds, “And I don’t count in between our classes.”

“Well...” she sounds unsure.

Lifting his eyebrow, he makes a point. “You see? Can’t think of it, can you?”

She giggles again, making him laugh along with her.

“Okay, you got me,” she admits, and as soon as they hit a red light she leans over as much as her seatbelt allows and he meets her halfway, sharing a slow tender kiss full of promises of what's to come.

Most of their kisses are like that.

Shane believes he'll never get tired of kissing her, of holding her precious face in his rough hands knowing she is the best thing life has given him after so many curveballs. And when a beat of stillness ensues and her eyes are on him, he thinks he could die happily if the last thing he sees are those eyes and her love for him reflected in them.

They drive to a drive-through to pick up some sandwiches and leaving the car on a parking lot nearby, they take a stroll down the streets of their town talking about their day while sharing the sandwiches, like they always do. Gaby teases him about his form, saying he's been slacking and he counters her accusation by lifting her bridal style, minding her dress, and jokingly starting to do squats.

Her laughter rings in his ears and he wishes she never stop smiling and laughing, wishes he could always be the one to make her laugh so wholeheartedly. Her nails are grazing his scalp as she kisses his cheek and down his jaw, then snuggles her face in his neck as he inhales her sweet scent.

There it is once again, that peace that washes over him with just having her in his arms.

After finishing their stroll, Shane drives them to the hill atop of Gabriela’s favourite park. The place is pretty secluded, far from prying eyes and the view over King's County is mesmerizing. When they get out of his pick-up truck, Shane walks around and pulls down the tarp covering the back of it.

His heart is in his throat, his hands feel clammy as he awaits Gaby's reaction.

_Maybe she will think it's too much. What if this was a bad idea?_

Gabriela gasps at the sight, hand over her mouth.

Shane has laid out several blankets and pillows in the back of the truck so that it resembles a pretty cosy and warm bed.

“What’s this?” she asks, walking around to get a better look.

“I remembered you tellin' me you’d like to stargaze in this park once. Thought this would be better than lyin' on dirty and cold ground.”

He's about to apologise for assuming anything, for thinking she would like this idiotic idea when her voice brings him out of his muddled brain, asking him to help her climb up.

He does so and with a grin on his face as his hands settle on her sides to lift her up, then he follows suit. They lie down on their backs first before Gaby shifts so she's on her side, snuggling against Shane as they cast their eyes towards the night sky.

The only sounds they hear are crickets and night bugs intermingled with their even breathing and Gaby’s occasional content sigh. Clasping her hand in his, he lifts it to his lips and kisses each knuckle tenderly then rests their laced hands on his chest, over his heart.

It is so peaceful, away from the sounds of the town and nosy townsfolk that seem to have nothing better to do than spy on others. His mom and he have been victims of vicious rumours far too many times for it not to become just an annoying background noise.

They talk and tease each other as they watch and try to count the stars. Gabriela gazes up at Shane, her eyes stopping at a small scar on his cheek from shaving.

She thinks how wonderful it all is, how she can hardly believe this boy that has his arm wrapped around her and holds her hand so gently, the one who brought her here just because she mentioned it once in passing, is the same one that just months ago had been changing girlfriends the way he changed his socks.

“What?” he turns and looks at her quizzically, though there's a semblance of smile there.

“What _what_?” she counters, biting her lip so as not to laugh. He looks so adorable with that confused expression that she has to reach up and press a kiss in the line between his eyes, then on his three-time broken nose that does nothing to mar his handsome face.

“What are you thinking?”

Turning to lie on her stomach and propping herself on her elbows, she takes a minute before answering. “I was thinkin’ how sweet you are for doin’ this for me.”

“So, you like it?” he sounds insecure, so unlike his usual cocky self.

Gabriela wonders just how much time he must have spent planning this and having to face Mrs. Grimes on top of it all... Shane cares about her, she knows that. It’s just that sometimes she gets too lost in her own head and his history with girls to really appreciate what they have.

“Very much,” she tells him honestly, “No other boyfriend’s ever done something this romantic for me.”

“Idiots,” he exclaims dramatically, rolling his eyes as he turns to lie on his side, propping his head on one arm, the other wrapping around her waist.

“Maybe. Or maybe you’re just a romantic at heart and hide behind this tough jock exterior.”

“That right?”

“Mhmm,” she answers, her lips pressed together to hide her grin.

Shane chuckles and pulls her towards him, their noses now pressed together. “You got me, girl. But don’t let this spread around,” he tells her somewhat conspiratorially, “I gotta reputation to uphold.”

“No problem. I’d rather keep this Shane all to myself.”

They spend some time in silence, just kissing, since that is their favourite pastime, until they have to catch their breathes.

Caressing his cheek, Gabriela asks him eventually, somewhat hesitantly, “We’re different, aren’t we? You and I, I mean.”  
“Of course we are,” he replies, though he sounds confused by her question.

Eyes darting towards his collar, she takes her time to form her thoughts. “It’s just that... We’ve been together for three months now, right?” She looks up to see Shane nod, then continues, “I would have thought we’d break up by now with your track record. No offence.”

He huffs a sigh, but wastes no time in answering her, “No offence taken, darlin’. I thought you’d dump my sorry ass before the first week was up. Glad you didn’t, though.”

“Well,” she arches her brow, “I did wait quite a bit for you to brave up enough to ask me out.”

When he rolls his eyes again she laughs, shaking her head at his reaction. His response has her bursting in tears from laughter.

“Do y’ know how much it took me to psych myself up? I thought I was gonna puke.”  
“No, you didn’t!” she gasps.

“And when I saw that asshole _James_ ,” he says the guy’s name in the most obnoxious manner, “trying to butter you up... Man, I lost it.”

Licking her lips, Gabriela surprises him by straddling him, her palms splayed over his chest. Shane reaches up to cup her cheek, stroking her cheekbone with his thumb, smiling warmly at her.

“Were you gonna punch him?” Gabriela asks him, though she knows the answer.

Shane’s always been protective of her, even before they got together. She will never tell him this, but flirting with James was her last resort in getting Shane to finally ask her out. Gabriela couldn’t understand how he could be so open and flirty with all other girls, yet so closed off and shy when it came to her.

That is, until their first date, when Shane brought his A-game and swept her off her feet.

His answer is as expected, “Was thinkin’ ‘bout it.”

His hands get lost under her dress as his voice grows more serious, eyes never leaving hers.

“And yeah, this thing between us, it’s different. I can’t explain how, but it is. It just feels better than anything I had before on every level possible. I wouldn’t want to change a thing.”

And she believes him. God, she believes him because she has never felt more loved or cherished than with him.

She teases him anyway, just to break the tension and the seriousness of their conversation.

“Me neither. But what are we gonna do with your horde of admirers?”

“My what?” he gives her another confused look as his fingers massage her thighs, eliciting a soft moan out of her and breaking her chain of thoughts.

It takes her a few moments to collect herself. Leaning forward, she rest her hands on either side of his head. His hands automatically travel up to cup her behind and she makes no protest. She’s already shivering at the feel of his hands on her skin, so gentle yet so impatient.

“Oh come on, Shane. You tellin’ me you don’t realise Vanessa’s been all over you, more so since we became official.”

Shaking his head, he lifts his head slightly, lips brushing against hers. “I don’t even know who she is.”

“Mhhhm,” Gabriela hums, her hands already gripping his hair, pulling at it to make him look up at her. She grinds against him, and he groans, but she stops him from kissing her. Instead, Gabriela brushes his nose with hers, swiping her tongue along his lip.

“I got my eyes on you and you alone, darlin’. Just you,” Shane assures her. His fingers are already on the hem her panties, slowly peeling them off.

“Well that’s nice to hear. You have a nice face and I like to look at you too.”

They are both chuckling until Gabriela finally gives in and kisses him as Shane pulls her panties down her legs and tosses them aside, squeezing her behind, making her moan into his mouth.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shane's POV of his encounter with Gaby at the hospital and another flashback to their high school days :D 
> 
> Thanks to those who've commented and left kudos :D

He is looking at her like a starved man looks at a table brimming with food, his soul still hungry for her in spite of all the years they have spent apart. Before he has any chance of saying something, asking her how come she’s back, she’s turning her back on him, and not for the first time, Shane feels like she’s ripping his heart right out if his chest and stomping on it like it’s nothing more but dust under her feet.

As she hands Lori and Carl the sandwiches she brought them, he lifts the bottle she dropped and hands it to Carl. It doesn’t escape his notice that Gaby goes rigid the moment he approaches, and for a second, Shane has a hard time understanding why.

Was her hate for him still strong after so long that she can’t even stand being...

Who is he kidding? Of course it is. She fled the town, left her family and friends behind and never once looked back, all because she despised him. Years had done nothing to wane that disdain, but seem to have augmented it.

He paces back to the wall and leans on it, his arms crossed on his chest as he fixes his gaze on her, silently pleading with her to look up, to say something, anything. He’d even be okay with her yelling at him. The silent treatment though... that hurts him the most because it feels like she has nothing to say to him at all. Her silence cuts right through him, piercing that bubble of avoidance he's been living in since she abandoned him, seemingly with no remorse.

Unuttered words burn his throat, but Shane just can't make himself open his mouth. Partly it's because he's afraid she will eventually look up with those emerald eyes of hers and send daggers his way. Shane doesn’t think he could stand to have her look at him that way again.

His last moment with her before she left was charged with so much anger on her part, not that he was anything better. The argument, their shouting, spiteful words that cut their hearts and broke their love... And her eyes that once looked at him like he was the best thing in her life, looking at him in that moment like they would set him on fire if they could.

Funny how all it took for his self-deprecation to rear its ugly head was seeing the girl of his dreams in flesh. Not that he ever stopped hating himself either. 

If he hadn't been that stupid, if he hadn't given into his urges, if he had been there maybe, maybe...

Shane's _maybes_ all hang in the air like dust particles – ubiquitous, covering him night and day, following him wherever he goes, tormenting him with visions of what his life could have been like.

Seeing her before him, shining in that sundress immediately reminds him of their first date.

She was stunning, and his breath had caught in his throat as he watched her descend the stairs in the Grimes' house, her smile wide and bright. Later that night, after they had got drunk on each other, she twirled in her yellow sundress and laughed wholeheartedly, arms outstretched, looking like the sun itself had descended onto Earth lighting up everything in her proximity.

Looking at her now, he notices the way her hands shake, they way she is so adamant to not even glance in his direction. She looks as if she stopped breathing all together, her face completely pale.

Is it because of him, because he’s there?

Again, of course it is.

Lori takes her hand in hers, averting Shane’s attention from Gabriela’s face to her hands. Selfish bastard that he is, he can’t help the tight knot that unties in his stomach when he realises there is no engagement ring, no wedding ring on her finger.

He knows she’s not married, knows she’s not engaged. Gabriela might have left him, did everything she could to forget about him, _them_ , but Shane could never shake her off. So, yeah, he stalks her social media and the magazines her works appear in, begs Rick and Lori to tell him about her because he has been so desperate to know about her life without him. He saves her photos on his phone, scrolls over dozens of images of Gaby every once in awhile when the reality of his own miserable existence lies heavy on his shoulders.

He’s happy for her, he is because her happiness means more to him than anything else in this goddamn world. However, he hates her too. Hates her for being able to move on, have that happiness without him while he is stuck in this town, leading an empty life full of regrets and resentment.

Bone-tired, Shane finally moves to sit, cautious to sit across from Gabriela, Lori, and Carl. Somehow, he knows Gaby wouldn’t like having him near her now, or ever for that matter. His gaze is fixed on her, there’s nothing else he can see or think about.

_She is real, she’s here._

Somewhere in the back of his mind, a thought arises. _The anniversary. Lori and Rick’s anniversary. That’s why she came back._ In all this Gabriela-induced haze, Shane forgot about the reason they are all there: Rick got shot, Rick is in a coma.

 _Fuck_ , he thinks, he’s a horrible friend. How could he be thinking of Gaby when his best friend, his brother, is fighting for his life and may never wake up again?

Shit, this whole day is one giant clusterfuck of surprise and tragedies and Shane just wants to get his hands on some liquor to numb his senses.

Letting out a heavy sigh, he drags his hand across his face. It's all fucking too much for him. He was never overtly sensitive person, but this shit right here, having his past sitting across from him, having his present dangling between life and death and his family suffering meanwhile, Shane realises how uncertain, undefined, and aimless his future is.

Had this happened to him, there would have been no one but Rick and his family to mourn him, to cry for him. And who knows, maybe they wouldn't have cried at all. Maybe they would have just pitied him and his empty life devoid of any relationships beyond occasional hook-ups.

This is absolutely the worst moment to have an existential crisis, to wonder what he has done with his life, but he can't help it.

Gaby is back and all the memories he fought so hard to push deep down are struggling to resurface. Shane wonders if she...

Of course she does. What a stupid thing to wonder. She must be thinking of the same thing in this moment. It was the one thing they looked forward to before their lives got fucked up by a bunch of high school dumbasses, his own idiocy, and her hot temper.

Hours pass and there is no change. The doctors send them all home with promises of contacting them should anything change. Carl and Lori head towards the exit, Gabriela following them. Shane walks way behind them all, feeling hot anger radiate of his high school love. If he were braver in this moment, he would call out to her, implore her to speak to him even if it is just to dump all her ire on him and for him to yell right back at her all his frustration.

He isn't though. There's so much confusion in his mind and exhaustion in his body, that Shane leaves her be.

Maybe he'll gather courage next time. _Maybe._

When they all settle inside Gabriela’s car (it must be hers, since Lori came with him), Shane leans over the passenger window.

“You let me know if you need anything, okay?” he tells Lori as his eyes wander off to Gaby for a split second. Lori nods absentmindedly, still distraught, wringing her fingers.

It isn’t until now that Shane actually pays her any attention, noticing she’s barely holding onto her sanity amidst all this. His conscience nags at him, lets him know he’s a jerk for worrying and thinking so much about Gabriela today when his partner is in a goddamn hospital and his family is torn apart.

Jesus, she really messes him up.

Glancing over at Carl sitting in the backseat, Shane realises the kid’s face is all swollen from crying.

_Fuck, I’m a fucking idiot._

“Hey, Carl? I’ll come by tomorrow, ‘kay, bud?” he says, trying to remedy his today’s behaviour, knowing fully well he won’t forgive himself for it.

Gaby messes with his mind like it’s the easiest thing in the world.

And shit, for her, it is.

She was always the only one that could rile him up enough to make his blood boil, the only one he cared for so much he would have moved the heavens and earth just to keep her by his side, to make her happy. Their fights were simultaneously the most painful and passionate exchanges that ended up with them either not talking for days or tearing each other’s clothes off just to feel closer.

Somehow, they brought both the worst and the best in each other.

To this day, Shane hasn't figured out if it was a good or a bad thing.

“Yeah, Shane,” Carl replies with a hoarse voice and Shane's heart breaks for this family once again.

He stays put on the parking lot as they drive off, and only then walks to his car, barely standing on his feet. Taking a few minutes to collect himself, Shane drives home, barely registering the traffic lights and stops signs. A cop, ignoring the law. How ironic.

When he gets home, he's quick to shed his clothes and goes to shower, hoping it will clear his head and calm him down.

It doesn't work, obviously. He's too tense, to rattled. Images, memories flash before his eyes and he can't stop them.

 _Fuck, fuck, fuck._ Why did she have to come back?

Shane has little strength to do anything but put on some clean boxer briefs and crash on his bed, forgoing dinner altogether.

Sleep comes easily that night, but so do nightmares. He wakes up a few times drenched in sweat, heart pounding like crazy, the image of Gaby lying on the floor, crying, covered in blood and him, with bloodied hands standing above her still playing in his mind.

_He hurt her. It was his fault. It was all his fault._

* * *

They were inseparable from the very start of their relationship, but when they go back to school the week following their weekend spent together, Shane and Gaby are all over each other, squeezing in as much time together as possible whenever they can.

Shane can't keep his hands off her and Gaby does nothing to discourage him. It is as if that time spent together reinforced the love they share, so that they crave each other even more.

Shane is insatiable, always seeking physical contact with her whether to caress her cheek, squeeze her hand, push her gently against the locker to kiss her senseless, or tuck a lock of her hair behind her ear and press a kiss against her neck. He spares no moment in showing her how much he loves her even though Gabriela shies away from being too affectionate at school due to the rampant gossip network. She’s never been keen on being the centre of anyone’s attention anyway. Sometimes though, she slips and surprises Shane by kissing him so eagerly in the middle of the hallway that he swears he can hear people gasp, although he’s not sure if it’s in wonder or envy.

 _Fuck ‘em,_ he thinks. He’s got his girl and he couldn’t care about these shitheads.

His football buddies sometimes try to engage him in their locker-room talk, try to make him spill the beans on how Gaby is ‘in the sack’. Shane is quick to shut them down immediately, ready to beat the crap out of anyone who so much dares to give Gabriela the stink eye, let alone say something bad and demeaning about her.

Gabriela is on cloud nine. None of her previous boyfriends have been as attentive as Shane is, none of them showed the care for her like he does. What irritates the hell out of her is a group of girls who keep pestering her about Shane, trying to rile her up, hitting on Shane when Gaby isn’t with him. Shane shrugs it all but Gaby feels uneasy knowing firsthand how cruel and adamant these type of girls can be. Lori is supportive as always, but Gaby’s temper sometimes gets the better of her, causing her to get into fights with them.

 

“Who the fuck cares about what they say or do, darlin? I’ve got you. Don’t need nobody else,” Shane tells her one day as they’re sitting under a tree in that park Gaby loves so much, his head in her lap as she combs his hair.

She laughs loudly and he joins in, reaching up to play with a strand of her hair.

“God, you’re so cheesy!” Gaby is still laughing, her cheeks a soft shade of pink.

Lifting his brow and gasping, he looks at her like she really insulted him. “Excuse you, me being honest is cheesy?”

Leaning down, she presses a kiss against his forehead and hears him sight contently. “No, it’s sweet. I love you.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, you dumb pine tree.”

Gabriela still doesn’t understand why Shane looks at her in disbelief whenever she confesses her love for him, always having to double check, as if he thinks the words just slip from her mouth carrying no meaning whatsoever.

Seeing him smile when she affirms it, the way his dark eyes light up and he snuggles his head against her shirt-covered stomach and kisses her there... Well, how could she not be lovestruck with him, this silly boy with curly hair and a heart of gold?

After a beat of silence he asks, “Wanna come over to my place tonight? My uncle’s gonna be out with his friends playing poker.”

She feigns thinking it over, before finally answering, “I’ll have to sneak out.”

“Oh, a badass rebel, are you?”

Looking at him softly, she replies. “For you? Always.”

 

  
It's past eleven when Gabriela manages to sneak out through the back door. Thankfully, everyone is sound asleep. Shane is waiting for her just outside the house and when she finally comes out, she’s jumping into his arms as if she hasn’t seen him an a week and not just a few hours.

“Were going on foot or?”

“Yep, thought we could use some fresh air.”

There a slightly cold breeze blowing, so Shane puts his arm around her shoulder when he notices her shivering in her thin shirt. She, in turn, wraps her arm around his back, snuggling into his side with a grin as they walk for some ten minutes to his uncle’s house.

Shane unlocks the door and guides her towards his bedroom upstairs. As soon as they're in and Shane locks the door just in case, Gabriela takes off her tennis shoes, jeans and shirt, settling into his bed in her sports bra and boy shorts while he goes to the bathroom. Soon he’s back, wearing nothing but boxer briefs. Grinning, Shane slides under the covers, immediately winding his arms around her.

“You’re so beautiful, you know that?” he tells her, brushing her hair out of her face.

_This sap._

“Yeah, but thanks for acknowledging it.”

He brushes his finger against her cheekbone, eyes still trained on hers. He makes no move to do anything else aside from drawing Gaby into his embrace so they’re pressed body to body and he can feel every inch of her against him.

They look at each other for a long time, Gabriela’s fingers playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck as his fingers wrap around a strand of her chestnut hair, twirling it absentmindedly.

Eventually, Gabriela breaks the silence.

“I’ve got something to tell you.”

“Yeah?”

“I got that scholarship for the NYU!” she practically yells, not able to hide her joy.

“You did? Congrats, baby.”

Shane’s all over her, kissing her cheeks and repeating how awesome she is and that he never doubted she’d get in.

Her voice trembles a little as she speaks, “I’m so excited. Just imagine, this time next year, I’m gonna be strolling down the streets of New York.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Shane repeats weakly as his grip on her hip tightens.

“What is it?”

“Nothing, darlin’. I’m happy for you.”

“We won’t break up, if that’s what you’re worried about,” she’s quick to assure him, being familiar with the inner workings of his mind.

“We’re gonna be away from each other,” he states matter-of-factly, like them being apart is a done deal already and will really affect their relationship to such a point. He’s always been doubtful of the good things in his life, especially when they keep slipping away.

His mom, his family, and now Gaby.

Gabriela, trying to pull him away from his dark thoughts, asks him if he had got any admission letters.

“Not yet, still waiting. Playing the football prodigy card.”

She kisses him briefly. “They’d all be fools not to take you. I’m kinda hoping you’d be close to me. Wouldn’t it be great?”

Grinning, he agrees, “Sure it would.”

“We could rent a place together until we graduate from college, and see how we get along.”

Gabriela is too enthusiastic about it all, she knows. Who knows what will happen once she gets to New York. It might all be horrible. They’re both almost broke, having saved just a bit of cash, for emergency. There’s no way they could live in New York on their own without finding a job, and working and studying seems a heavy task to handle in her mind, let alone in reality.

Still, she likes to dream, likes to pretend they could really finish their studies together, get a place of their own, find good jobs and spend their lives together.

It’s Shane and her, and somehow she can’t imagine it being any other way.

“I’d like that, baby,” Shane tells her, eyes so bright with happiness her chest tightens. “I love you.”

“Love you too,” the words leave her lips and she feels just as giddy as the first time she said them.

“Sleep now, you’ve got that test tomorrow.”

Shane sets the alarm to wake them up in time for Gaby to sneak back to the Grimes’ without anyone noticing. They fall asleep in each other’s arms, Shane’s head resting on her chest, arm wrapped around her waist.

 

 

When Gabriela opens her eyes in the morning, it's still dark outside.

Over the course of the night, they shifted in bed so that she was now spooning Shane, feeling his warm naked back pressed against her chest. Hoping to wake him up, Gabriela starts trailing kisses up his back, across his shoulder blades, and when she reaches the juncture of his shoulder and neck, she bites it lightly then licks the place where her teeth had left a mark.

Lazily licking and kissing her way up his neck until she reaches his earlobe, she gently bites into it and it is then that she hears Shane groan, mumbling something. She giggles in his ear as he turns around swiftly, catching her by surprise, pinning her hands above her head and gazing at her playfully.

“What were you trying to do?”

“Wake you up,” Gabriela says as she hooks her legs around his hips. “And, I think it worked.”

“Oh, you bet your pretty ass it did,” he growls, hovering over her before leaning his forehead against hers and taking a deep breath.

Gabriela risks looking down to see him fully erect. She’d be lying if she said it doesn’t stroke her ego seeing the effect she has on him. “Shane-”

“What? I spend the night with my girlfriend who woke me up knowing this would happen. Don’t act surprised.”  
  
She laughs, wrapping her arms around his shoulders as she pushes him down against her with her legs still wrapped around him.

“How much time do we have?” she whispers in his ear breathily, kissing his stubbled cheek.

“Some twenty minutes before the alarm goes off.”  
  
“Plenty of time then.”

 

 

Shane accompanies her to her house and they share a long kiss before Gabriela ducks inside to get ready for school. Shane goes back to his house and does the same, only to return an hour and half later to pick up Gabriela and Rick.

“Hey, man.”

“Hey. What happened to you last night?” Rick asks him as he buckles his seatbelt in the front seat, and Gabriela does the same in the backseat.

“What do you mean?”

“Glenn had that party at his house. You didn’t show up.”

“Oh! Must’ve slipped my mind,” Shane says, sharing a look with Gabriela in the rearview mirror. She’s suppressing a smile, but her eyes are shining, clearly still dazed by the way they spent their morning.  
  
When Shane parks his truck, Rick is getting out hastily to go find Lori, leaving Gabriela and Shane alone. He’s quick to turn around just as she’s leaning over to meet him halfway.

“I liked waking up with you.”

He’s a hair’s breadth from her now, the tips of their noses touching. “We’re gonna have to make that happen more often, then.”

They exit the car and walk hand in hand. Shane uses the little time they have before their first class starts to pin her against her locker and kiss her hard, his hand holding onto her hip, her own under his half-unbuttoned plaid shirt, on his chest.

“You wanna come over tonight?”

It comes out like a plea. In a way, it is. Shane loves having her in his space, her perfume filling the air in his room, her hair ties scattered here and there, a spare toothbrush and a change of clothes in one of his drawers, just in case.

“I don’t think it's a good idea to be sneaking out two nights in a row,” Gabriela says, biting her lip; there’s a hint of apology there, he senses it.

Shane's face falls, however he doesn’t pressure her. She’s right. If anyone caught her...“Okay. Can we at least see each other after school? I can wait for you.”

Now he really is begging. It’s difficult for him to grasp this need to be with her all the time since he’s never experienced anything remotely similar. At times, he thinks he’s too clingy and she’ll get sick of him because of it. It’s his constant fear, if he’s being honest. He’s come to rely on her, being near her, too much. That’s why he’s afraid what could happen once she moves to New York.

Gabriela cups his face, thumbs brushing over his cheekbones, and he surrenders, closing his eyes and relaxing slightly. _Here and now, Shane_ , he tells himself. _Think of here and now._

“What about your uncle? I don't want him getting angry with you for being late or missing your shift entirely again.” She pauses, then adds, “Besides, we have that English test to study for. We can't be slacking now.”

She’s worried, he can tell. And yeah, she’s right. He’s been slacking a lot lately, mainly because he’d be with Gabriela and completely forget everything else. But he needs money if he plans on leaving the town with her, even if he doesn’t get any scholarships. New York is expensive as shit and he ain’t about letting them both starve. There’s a rough plan in the back of his mind about what he could do once they move there, but he’s yet to discuss it with Gaby. He’s waiting for the right moment, being hopefully he’ll get a scholarship for a college near her.

Burying his head in the crook of her neck, he wraps his arms around her waist, pressing their bodies together. He feels her arms wind around his shoulders, her hands cradling his head. “I just... You're right, baby.”

Yep, he’s too wrapped up in her, in them. If he could, he’s spend every waking moment with her. Alas, teenage life and those sorts of things don’t really allow them that luxury.

Kissing his cheek, Gaby pulls back, hauling her backpack. “I'll call you tonight, 'key? Love you.”

All he can do is sigh, kissing her briefly even though all he wants to do is get lost in her lips. “Love you too, sweetheart. Go, don’t be late for your class.”

 

 

After school, Shane makes his way to his uncle’s shop. There doesn’t seem to be so much work to do today, and he’s glad. He doesn’t think he could focus anyway and having his uncle yelling at him for doing a poor job is not on his list for the day.

Leaving his backpack in the office, he quickly changes into his uniform – a black short-sleeved Henley and navy coveralls with more holes than a sieve. Checking his phone to see if Gaby wrote him (no messages), he shuts it off and puts it in his backpack. _Yep, he’s definitely too clingy._

He’s been working on Mrs. Greene’s car for an hour now when he hears his uncle’s familiar footsteps. Getting out from under the car, his face dirty, oil and dirt smudged on his cheeks and forehead, Shane lets out a groan as he gets up, wiping his hands with a cloth.

His uncle regards him with raised eyebrows as he takes off his baseball cap and drapes his jacket over a chair. “Wow, I can’t believe you actually showed up on time.”

Shane rolls his eyes, joining his uncle as they both sit at an old coffee-stained table set inside the shop. “Oh, come on, Frank. It was one time!”  
  
“Yeah, but I don’t want you gettin’ lazy or irresponsible. Say, when did your girl leave this mornin’?”

Shane’s tongue trips over every possible word he could have said. Instead, a weak and screechy “What?” comes out. He can feel his eyes going wide, his breath catching in his throat. When the hell did his uncle realise about Gaby coming over?

As if guessing what his nephew is thinking, Frank lets out a gravely laugh, patting his leg. “Oh, come on. I’m not stupid, kiddo. You keep forgettin’ I was once your age.”

“Frank, listen-” Shane starts but Frank puts his hand up to stop him.

“I’m not gonna preach you, ‘kay? I just want you to be careful. You gotta think of your future, son. Think with your head and not your dick.”

This immediately riles him up because dammit, it’s not about sex with Gaby and him. It was never about that at all! He’s red in face, his hands are shaking in frustration.

“It not like that, Frank! Not with Gaby. You know her, you know me!”

The older man shakes his head not wanting to antagonise Shane. “I know. That’s why I‘m breakin’ my own rule of never talking ‘bout your personal life. She’s a good girl, but with her family situation-”

 _For fuck’s sake_ , Shane thinks, _why the fuck does that matter?_ People have been judging her ever since her dear parents decided she’s too much of a burden for them and kicked her out of their house, like it was somehow Gaby’s fault her parents are garbage. He sees the way people look at her, hears the kind of stories they tell about her behind her back. It kills him because she doesn’t deserve that.

It makes him even angrier it’s his own uncle who dares to mentioned this, in spite of the fact that he knows Gaby and knows the kind of a person she is. How kind, sweet, and hardworking his girl is. Besides, Shane has made it very clear to everyone he’s not fucking around with this relationship and what Gaby means to him.

“Her parents are jerks, but that’s not her fault!” he yells and stand up, knocking off his chair in the process. He runs his hand through his hair, breathing heavily and biting his tongue not to say anything else because he loves his uncle.

Frank’s calm, compared to Shane, as he tries to get his reasoning across. “I know it’s not, and I’m not blamin’ ‘er. But neither of you have the luxury to be playin’ around, not now. You’ll soon be off to college, and you might find a way to make this work. You might not.” Shane scoffs but it doesn’t deter Frank in the slightest. “But I’m just advising you to focus on yourself first and your future, son. Girls come and go.”

Rubbing his face, he sighs, trying not to sound too sarcastic and bitter as he replies, “Thanks, uncle, but Gaby’s not holding me back. We’re both in it for the long haul.”

With that, he heads back to work on Mrs. Greene’s car missing his uncle’s “We’ll see ‘bout that.”

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to hit that kudos button and drop a comment to let me know your thoughts. You can find me on tumblr at lightblindingme


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